Friday Free For All

Hey everyone, I apologize for the silence around here lately.  Our boys have been sick this week, especially the baby. He was in the ER on Monday night for dehydration and vomiting. They did nothing for him, literally, except a swab for RSV and strep.  Tuesday we saw the pediatrician who gave him anti-nausea medicine which seemed to help some. Wednesday night he was more like his normal self. Wednesday night into Thursday morning, Carson was vomiting.  By school time he was fine, but he stayed home until he was vomit free for 24 hours. Thursday afternoon Jonathan got fever again and started being restless again. We saw the pediatrician today and he got 2 antibiotic shots, and oral antibiotics. He's vomiting still and has an ear infection and fever. I'm praying we can avoid the ER again this weekend, but it doesn't look too hopeful :(

Hope your family is staying healthy and warm in this crazy winter! We have 8-10 inches of snow coming our way again on Sunday!

Take care!

9 month old!

Jonathan is 9 months old today! I can't believe how fast the time is flying by us. I swear just the other day he was a tiny newborn with horrible reflux. Now he's a big boy, cruising the furniture, sitting up on his own, and giving 'loves' to his blanky and his brother. The boys play so well together and Jonathan loves following his big brother around the house.  We have our 9 month appointment this Friday, so I will update with that info on Friday. Here's some recent pics of our boy for now :)

Ch-Ch-Changes

If you've been around the blog for very long, you've probably noticed by now that Midwest Cornfed Mom has a new look!

With the help of Jamie at Clueless Momma Designs, I've given the blog a fresh new look.  I love it!

If you're looking for a new look for your blog, I highly recommend her! She's super nice, easy to work with, and very fast!

Favorite Things Giveaway Winner!

The winner of the Kissaluvs Fitted Cloth Diaper and One Size Sweet Pea Cover is: Mayla M.

Congratulations!

Thanks to everyone who entered!

Didn't win? You can buy these items to try yourself Here

*Winner has 48 hours to contact me regarding giveaway.  If winner does not contact me within 48 hours, I will draw a new winner. This post contains affiliate link.

Parenting the Child with Anxiety: Part 1 - Thick Skin

     Parenting a child with anxiety is a very emotionally draining task.  Not only do you have to learn to handle your child's emotions, but you also must recognize and control your own.  This can prove to be the hardest part of the entire struggle.

     A child with anxiety will often act inappropriately in social settings.  They may act goofy, try to make others laugh, become agitated, use bad language, etc.  They are doing this to try and make themselves comfortable in the situation they are in, not realizing it may actually bring them more attention, often negative attention.  This behavior often can be very frustrating for a parent to deal with.  It can cause embarrassment, and a feeling of being watched.  Our son is no exception to this. Carson has a tendency to act out when he is in social settings, trying to make himself more comfortable.  It's very difficult to get under control sometimes, as our correction only fuels it more. 

     This behavior leads to stares from people who don't understand. Parents talking about how the child "is a brat", "needs his butt beat", "has ADHD", "is a retard (BTW I HATE that word).", or "has parents who need shown how to be a parent".  Classmates parents alienate themselves and their children from you and your child. All of these hurt deeply as that child's parent.  Yes, we have heard every one of those about our son and ourselves.  Sometimes, from people who we thought of as "friends". 

     I think one of the hardest things for me as a parent is watching my child's friends stop playing with him. He's not invited to parties, sleepovers, or fun outings. It's not his fault that people judge him. People just don't get it. They see a child acting up and assume it's bad parenting or a bad child. They don't realize there could be an underlying problem.

    I've been in tears, more times than I can count, as a result of the looks, actions, or words from other parents, from feeling judged.  Parenting a child with anxiety requires "thick skin". You have to learn to hide the hurt and emotions from your child. Unfortunately, it's not always easy to do this. A few times our son has seen me cry.  He doesn't understand why, and often it only causes his anxiety to worsen and he begins to worry that he has done something bad.  It hurts as a mom to feel like you've done wrong and that you are failing your child.
    
      In addition to feeling judged, you also must deal with the feeling of frustration that parenting a child with anxiety presents. The inappropriate behaviors can be incredibly frustrating, especially in public settings. Learning to push that frustration aside and keep a positive, calm demeanor for your child is one of the most difficult things I've had to learn as a parent.  The motivation for it however, is more than enough to make me push through. My child needs my calmness to achieve his own sense of comfort.....plus, there's always wine to help mommy relax, right?

Happy Valentine's Day

           

Wordless Wednesday!

On the go...With Cloth Diapers!

Our household is a very busy one, even though our children are still young (5 years and 8 months).  We are out of the house three evenings a week for our son's hockey practice, and one weekend morning for basketball practice. Not to mention, going shopping, family outings, etc....you get the picture.  A lot of people think that it's a hassle to use cloth diapers when you're "on the go". Here's some of the questions people have asked me, and my answers.


Q:  Don't they take up too much space in the diaper bag?
---There are different shell & liner systems out there that come with disposable liners/inserts.  I have only tried the Flip Disposable Liners so far, and been quite pleased! They are super soft, and quite absorbant. We've even used them for 3 hour car rides without having any leaks. I can toss an extra cover in the bag with a few disposable liners, and they don't take up any more space than if I had put disposable diapers (Huggies or Pampers, etc.) in the bag...in fact, I think they take up less!  I also like the GroVia hybrid system for being out and about. I can take extra soakers in the bag and change them out as long as the shell is clean.  These take up very little space and can be put in the wet bag for washing when we get home.  Even when we take pocket diapers or AIOs with us on an outing, it doesn't take us that much space in the diaper bag.

Q:  Do the diapers smell in your bag?
---A wet bag contains the smell of dirty diapers when zipped.  My Planet Wise medium bag will hold 4-5 dirty or wet diapers while we are away from home without leaking smells or anything else into my diaper bag.

Q: Isn't it easier to just throw away a dirty diaper?
---I can change my baby anywhere, without having to have a trash can there to throw a disposable in, or without having to let a dirty diaper sit in my car to be forgotten and found weeks later. You don't forget where you put your cloth diapers when you notice one's missing from the laundry!

Q: What if your baby poops when you are out?
---I use flushable liners 98% of the time, so usually I can just flush the mess and have no worries.   Even if I'm not using a disposable liner at the time, I can put the diaper in the wet bag, and take care of it when we get home. The wet bag contains the smell and no one knows we are carrying around a dirty diaper with us! 

Using cloth while out and about doesn't have to be a burden. We can use our cloth diapers on the go without any problems. This summer, I'm even planning to use cloth while we visit Florida for a week!

Do you cloth outside the home? What are your tips for others who are on the go?

Anxiety and My Son

At three years old, our son started biting his fingernails, then his toenails.  By the time he was four, he would bite them until they bled. By 4 1/2 he had developed a "tic" where he was constantly clearing his throat.  When he gets very nervous about a new experience he vomits. If there's change in his routine, he acts out. If you aren't doing exactly what is supposed to be done, he would get upset and tell you. For the past couple of years, we have just chalked it up to him being a worrier. Then along came Kindergarten.  *Insert dramatic DUN DUN DUN music here*

There are a couple of children in our sons class who have problems staying in their seat, using nice words, etc. About 4 weeks into the school year, our son started acting out. He cried not to go to school, he yelled, hit, said hateful things. He was coming home with a note from the teacher about his behavior almost every day. The teacher told us not to worry, "boys just have a hard time adjusting to the change of routine."  We agreed that he has always had problems with changing his routine, and thought it would pass with time.

By the time Thanksgiving rolled around, we were at our whit's end with his behavior. He didn't want to go to school, he didn't want to leave home, he didn't want to leave the babysitter's house, etc., etc. He started hitting us or his baby brother, the words became more vulgar and hateful. We decided it was time to reach out for help. We asked his teacher and school for input and suggestions. Their only response was, "well Kindergarten is a tough adjustment. We could get him in to see the school counselor but that's a lot of paperwork, and takes a long time."  My reply was, "That's fine, do whatever you need to do. He can't keep going like this."

Four weeks later it was Christmas break. He hadn't spoke to a counselor, the school hadn't said another word about it. The behavior was still just as bad, with no sign it was going to improve. I decided to give up on his school for any help, and sought out professional help. We got him into a counselor who thought he had ADHD, or anxiety/depression issues. We agreed that it was possibly ADHD, as we had filled out the parent questionnaire about ADHD and it seemed, to us, like he fit in the impulsive category.

By the end of January, we saw his pediatrician. I felt like I'd been hit by a Mack truck when we left her office that day.  We had been going about this with the wrong frame of mind. Our son didn't have ADHD. He has severe anxiety, iron deficiency, and possible sleep disturbance. A "normal" score on the survey we filled out for him would be under 25...his score was 54.....FIFTY FOUR! No wonder he's so anxious and high strung! We saw her on a Monday, by Wednesday, he'd had labs drawn and been started on two new medications. One to help with the iron replacement, and the other for his anxiety.  She feels his acting out is his way of trying to make himself comfortable in an uncomfortable situation.  He may still have some impulsive behavior issues, but we can work on that with time. He sees a counselor every 2 weeks now also.

He still acts inappropriately, especially in social settings, but we are working on fixing one thing at a time. The hardest thing for me, is to see other parents judge my child, and my family for his behavior...but that's a whole other post for another day.

Dear Winter...

Dear Winter,

The 8 inches of snow you blessed us with on Tuesday was unkind.  You've caused 4 snow days for me at work, and 11 for Carson at school. The past 30+ days of almost constant snow on the ground and excessively cold temps have more than outstayed their welcome.  We've had more than our share of ice, snow, and sub-zero temperatures. It is time for you to leave. In fact, you can pack your little bag and go NOW! You may return after Thanksgiving is over this fall. 

Sincerely,

The Frozen Mom in the Midwest

Wordless Wednesday

Chunk!

Favorite Things Giveaway Hop!

Welcome to the Favorite Things Giveaway Hop, hosted by the Cloth Diaper Revival. 

Each blogger participating has a great cloth diaper prize for you to win, worth at least $20, so after you enter mine, be sure to hop around to all the others in the linky!  Don’t forget to enter to win one the GRAND PRIZE for the event!

One of my favorite cloth diapers for my son is a Kissaluvs fitted diaper paired with a Sweet Pea diaper cover. This has quickly become my "go-to" for bed time! These covers are seriously one of the softest covers I have ever felt.  The leg gussets are great for containing messes and getting a snug fit around my little man's chunky thighs. At 29" and 20 lbs at only 8 months, my son is on the largest rise at times, but has plenty of room to grow and still be able to wear this diaper. The waist snaps are only on the second setting! This cover also works well with a prefold, or flat, pad folded and placed inside of it.  When we use it for this purpose, we can use the middle rise setting with no problem! I was able to rinse out the cover, hang it to dry and reuse it again the next night. 

Sweet Pea Covers are one size covers that fit from birth to potty training. They are made of durable waterproof PUL, with a soft exterior. They are available in a variety of cute colors and prints, with durable snap closure.  They are a great buy, considering they retail around $11.

The Kissaluvs fitted has made night times much better for us! The Medium/Large fits Jonathan wonderfully. The cotton fleece is soft and super absorbent. Most nights he wakes up dry with just the Fitted, some nights we add a doubler. If we add a doubler, he wakes up with the back half of the fitted diaper dry!  At around $15 per diaper, these too are a great buy and an awesome overnight solution. 

Here's what bedtime looks like for us:

You can find both of these items at Kelly's Closet, or you can enter to win them below! 






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All opinions in this post are my own. The prize for this giveaway is purchased by myself. Cloth Diaper Revival and the Favorite Things bloggers are not responsible for sponsors who do not fulfill prize obligations. This post does contain affiliate links.